Member Spotlight: Amy Neff

Why is writing important to you and why do you think it’s an important medium for the world? Nearly every important lesson I’ve learned about life I’ve learned through the creative life, lessons about failure and persistence and being kind to yourself and showing up and doing the work. And every hard lesson in my real life, every hurt and heartbreak, grief and joy has been processed through my writing. Writing is the place I am my truest self, where I can explore what weighs on me, where I can capture what I hold most dear, where I can imagine and dream and live in new and interesting ways, where I can understand my feelings and thoughts and people around me on a deeper level. On a global level, writing is a way for all us to get outside of our own world that can feel so insular at times, empathize with others, and walk a different path. We can understand how we feel through writing in ways we can’t always express. It’s healing and it’s therapeutic and it’s exploratory and hard and it’s also deeply satisfying and fun, and it connects people to other lives and experiences they would not otherwise known.

What are your tried and tested remedies to cure writer’s block? Step away from the page. Go outside. Take a walk. Read poetry. Read a novel you love. Do something with your hands. Exercise. Journal and don’t lift the pen for a set number of minutes. Call a friend. It’s okay to not have an inspired writing session every time, and it’s okay to take breaks. But I don’t believe in writer’s block, per se, more like sometimes we have a puzzle we can’t solve by sitting in front of a computer, and sometimes we just need to move and think in a different way to release the way forward.

What is your favorite time to write? Much of this novel was written while juggling babies and then toddlers (my kids are now three and five, and have been home with me full-time throughout the bulk of writing this novel). So my favorite time to write is anytime I have a long uninterrupted stretch, which is a rare luxury to come by these days. Pre-kids, it was early morning, when I feel my most creative and energized. But I’m not picky these days!

What’s the best piece of writing advice you’ve ever received and would like to impart to other writers? I love so much of what Dani Shapiro writes about in her book, Still Writing, but especially the part about the creative life not being a race won by the swiftest, and to enjoy your time writing in the dark before you are published. This was crucial messaging for me, as my debut is a novel ten years in the making. It’s such a good reminder that the ticking clock is only in your own head. It’s the quality that matters, not the time it takes. And once you are published, you will never have that time to yourself in the same way again, so enjoy it while it lasts and don’t wish yourself through to the other side. You and your writing will be better for the time spent there.

What excites you most about being a writer in today’s age? I love how instantly connected you can be to readers. Someone can read my book and message me on Instagram minutes later, there is an ease to it, someone who may not have taken the time to write a letter or track down my email address can find me online in moments. I’ve already been getting messages from early readers because my book has resonated with them, which is such a gift as I approach publication day. I can see people reading on the beach, on a boat, in the airport or café or in their backyard. There is real “proof of life” of the book being out in the world in a tangible way.

Amy Neff’s The Days I Loved You Most is out July 30 with Park Row.